AIM Conversations: Sometimes I Say Inappropriate Things

Phil: im surprised you didnt respond with a quip about how tight your vagina is
Hannah: i don’t mind discussing other people’s, but mine is off limits
Phil: talk of your supple breast are okay but the vagina is where you cross the line?
Hannah: i never said that they were, i just said they werent old and saggy.
Phil: and FYI you said you have good boob genes
Hannah: ok, i did.
Hannah: but that is a fact.
Phil: but your tight vagina isn’t a fact?

****

Phil: YOU LOVE THAT CAT MORE THAN ME
Steph: No I hate you both
Phil: True, but the cat’s never been inside you
Phil: …right?
Steph: Neither have you
Phil: Excuse me…a game of just the tip counts thank you very much.

****

Phil: I love tequila. It makes women take their clothes off
Rachael: Not always
Phil: Oh my fault. I must be confusing tequila with my mad game.

****

Phil: I blogged about slamming you on facebook
Hannah: I did read that btw. That sir was very mean
Hannah: my boobs definetely do not sag
Hannah: I have good boob genes…my mom’s boobs were still perky when she died at 43
Phil: This is so going on my blog
Hannah: oh god

****

Phil: Alcohol is a mans best friend
Hannah: It really is
Hannah: When i think of the good fortune that some guys had of sleeping with me when I was retardely drunk…
Phil: haha
Hannah: its true, i’m much better when I’m drunk
Phil: blogging this…
Hannah: Goddamn it!

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One thought on “AIM Conversations: Sometimes I Say Inappropriate Things

  1. Pingback: The Best of Cognitive Dissonance: It’s Like Memory Lane, Except With Alcohol and Assholes | Cognitive Dissonance

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