Truer Words Have Never Been Spoken

Yet another reason I love reviews from AICN:

There’s a moment where Angelina comes out of a pool – and her naked ass is shown to us… for a very short eternity – and in that short eternity – the world was united – the ass was our lord and savior and war was a thing of the past, gas was cheap and I will have a farm on Mars.

Truly – Angelina’s bare dripping wet ass is the pinnacle of human cinematic experiences

Do you need any other reason to see WANTED? (It was actually a good movie too)


Uh oh…He’s Backkkk

Cognitive Dissonance is back in FULL FORCE now. Why? Because I’m rollin on my new Macbook…the new hotness…

Expect regular updates once again

How to be an Asshole With Style

An interaction between my boss and me at work…

Jen: i’m going to kill you
Jen: i have a direct line of fire from my office
Phil: That’s fine. Then you won’t have me to do all your work for you
Jen: i also started a rumor you have an std… i hope you feel the same way about that.
Phil: thats funny because i also started a rumor we were sleeping together
Phil: oops


Phil: what’s this facebook invite for?
Christina: A money bomb for McCain
Phil: haha no
Christina: oh come on
Christina: i rather take it up the ass for 4 more years and see my girl in the white house
Phil: Fine, If you let me give you anal ill vote for mccain
Christina: …
Phil: Thought so


Phil: How’s Brian? Is he glad you’re back?
Sarah: OF COURSE!! Can you imagine being away from ME for 2 whole weeks.
Phil: ….
Phil: I’m sorry, I’m not a particularly religious person so I’m having a hard time imagining heaven on Earth


Phil:  i told Rachel that I think the universe intentionally keeps us separated for longer than a few moments at a time in order to prevent the global consolidation of assholishness in one place
Tom: true
Tom: they’d have to open an abundance of suicide prevention centers wherever we lived
Tom:  to account for the people we’d demoralize
Phil: true
Phil:  they’d also have to open up more hospitals for the numerous amounts of sadist bitches we’d knock up
Phil: just ask Megan and her six kids