Relationship Etiquette: The Five Common Mistakes Girls Make

5. Remember…other people have feelings too– Let me take a moment to tell you something controversial. The world…does not….revolve…around you. (cue dramatic music). When a guy takes a moment to express a thought or feeling they have, this is not an invitation for you to hijack the conversation and start talking about yourself. For example, if your boyfriend says that he feels like the two of you don’t have fun anymore, this doesn’t mean that you should start bitching about how you think he’s blaming you for all the problems in the relationship,etc,etc.

4. Saying I’m just a girl is NOT a reason to suck at life. – I’m glad this one is first on the list because I know there are going to be girl out there who try and dismiss these facts because “i’m just being sexist”. But the truth is that being a girl doesn’t mean you have to suck. In fact…contrary to the belief’s of you and your friends, other girls who suck at life, there are many women who don’t use their gentials as an excuse for being whiny, over emotional, irrational,melodramtic,etc. You can’t say “yeah I’m being irrational…but i’m a girl.” just like I can’t say “Of course I don’t care about your feelings…I’m a guy”. The door swings both way ladies. Stop giving cool chicks a bad name just because you’re incapable of not sucking at life.

3. Just because you don’t follow the rules of logic doesn’t mean that they still don’t apply Guess what ladies…there’s not two standards for evaluating the validity of an argument. Either it follows the rules of logic or it doesn’t. If you make an claim you MUST provide a warrant to support said claim. Saying it’s what I feel is NOT a warrant neither is saying I don’t know. For example, if you accuse me of blaming you for a situation, ironic I know, you need to provide an example and a factual justification to support this accusation. Also you can’t get mad at guys for defending themselves with factual counterwarrants. (What kind of person attempts to tell their side of the story… those bastards!

So let me translate this into “girl” for you: If you accuse me of killing your puppy; you need to provide evidence which would implicate me in this action. While you’re gut feelings have been oh so accurate thus far in the relationship, let’s not leave anything to chance. When looking for evidence, remember that “you never did like my puppy!” is not quite the smoking gun you’re looking for. I mean, I never did like your sister either and she has the same intelligence, furry upper lip and desire to lick random boys as a puppy and I haven’t kill her…yet. Finally, while you might think that I’m arguing with you when I point out that your puppy is alive and well right next to you, I’m not arguing with you. Just letting you in on information relevant to your dellusions…errr arguments.

And no, your attempts to use logic jargon to make your unguided emotional rants seem logical don’t count.

2. Don’t take the more complicated route to a less desirable option…that’s STUPID- Here’s a novel idea ladies. If something is bothering you or you have something to say, you should actually say it. In case you hadn’t noticed, guys aren’t mind readers. And even more shocking to you, every issue does not need to involve drama. The best way to get something you want is to be upfront and honest about it. if you’d like a little bit more attention most guys would happily give it to you if you would just ask them in a direct and non nagging way. On the other hand, when you leave “hints” or speak in code and then get upset because your guy left his decoder ring in his other pants, nobody wins. You don’t get whatever it is you wanted and the guy has to deal with your whining and drama.

Aside from the pragmatic reasons why you should just be upfront, realize that you are an adult. Adults can’t rely on other people to tend to their needs. How about you accept some personal responsibility for your actions and stop being so passive and/or lazy. I know existentialism is a bitch, but we all have to deal with it.

1. DON’T MAKE SHIT UP! – Look…I know that you think that the events that you’re describing really occurred. But realize that a lot of girls flat out make shit up. It’s not that your lying per se or being deceptive. The problem lies in the fact that you tend to have selective listening and you read too much into things. Yeah, this is so pervasive that it requires two points. Crazy!

1A- Don’t read into things- Whether girls intend to or not, usually they don’t, they have a habit of looking at the world as if it were Lemony Snicket’s a Series of Unfortunate Events. That is to say, girls tend to ignore the good, focus on the bad and assume the worst. People view reality through the lens that they use. So when girls hear a seemingly simple statement from a guy they refuse to take it at face value, because statements women make usually are more complicated than they seem, see Rule #2. Hannah explains it best as follows:

Hannah: that’s only b/c those girls believe that life is a game for them to try to figure out
Phillip : yeah
Hannah: so he says no, that means that he’s not interested in that movie, and maybe in going to movies with me in general..omg he’s not intersted in me

Girls. When a guy says something simple and direct, trust me. They’re typically being simple and direct. There is no hidden meaning. This takes us into the second subpoint

2A- Hear what is said not what you want to hear- The words a person uses in a sentence are not optional. You can’t pick which ones you’ll pay attention to and which ones you’ll ignore. Sure, that might help you construct a more dramatic story, but thats all it’ll be. A story.


3 thoughts on “Relationship Etiquette: The Five Common Mistakes Girls Make

  1. It’s always refreshing to see a hot girl who is able to succeed in life whether its intelligence or simple drive to succeed. I dated a 10 who was empty upstairs and that relationship lasted about 2 weeks.

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