Random IM conversations

TheRoss2005: My dad’s girlfriend is fucking retarded
Extraneousfreak: How so?
TheRoss2005: She thought I could download an X-box

BUTTERSCOTCHFLAVOREDVAGINA: NO ONE BUT YOUR MOM HAS MADE YOU A SAMMICH
Phil: yup
Phil: isn’t that sad?
Phil: like…especially as a guy
BUTTERSCOTCHFLAVOREDVAGINA: uh, yeah. you sammich virgin
Phil: i am
Phil: i still have my v-card
Phil: sv card*
BUTTERSCOTCHFLAVOREDVAGINA: i’ll pop your sammich cherry and it will be a gooey bloody good time
Phil: haha
Phil: you’ll be my first
Phil: i have to admit
Phil: im kind of nervous
BUTTERSCOTCHFLAVOREDVAGINA: i’ll make you comfortable
Phil: will it hurt?
BUTTERSCOTCHFLAVOREDVAGINA: no, baby, of course not. well, ok, maybe for a second. that mustard can get in all the wrong places. but after that, it will feel good.

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